


the pieces we always seem to break

by littlelooneyluna



Category: Emmerdale, robron
Genre: Angst (high levels soz), Established Relationship, Infidelity, M/M, they are parents guys bless them
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-29
Updated: 2017-11-29
Packaged: 2019-02-06 20:22:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12825354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlelooneyluna/pseuds/littlelooneyluna
Summary: he doesn't know what he's doing, but soon enough he's kissing someone who isn't his husband, (robert sugden) and everything is wrong.





	the pieces we always seem to break

**Author's Note:**

> angst, just angst (with a happy ending) but yeah ...
> 
> angst.

 

Aaron runs all the way back home, doesn't bother about hailing a cab or anything like that.

His breathing is ragged and he resists the urge to vomit as he sights the village. Instead he slaps at his cheeks and tries to wake himself up, tries to come back to reality and stop acting like a prick.

He shakes his head and then he's walking towards his home, glass panels in the door reveal Robert standing in the living room rocking Annie up and down and bouncing. He almost looks like he's dancing and Aaron gives into the urge to be sick, throws up near the plant pots and knows Roberts's going to kill him for that.

Too.

Aaron hugs at his coat and then he's watching the door being clicked open. Robert's standing there in his burgundy jumper and tired eyes, Annie whimpering because of the cold.

She's awful with the cold, Aaron thinks. Just like her daddy.

"It's freezing out here." Robert complains, "Come inside." He says. And Aaron roots his feet into the ground, firm, hard, unmoving.

"Thought you didn't want me to come back." Aaron says, and he's back to a few hours ago.

Annie's screaming her head off and Robert can't find any of her bottles and he's blaming Aaron and then it gets so much worse.

Because Aaron's just had enough.

And he's tired, and he's been looking after Annie all day and all fucking week and Robert just comes in and expects everything to be okay and then he's mentioning _Seb_  and -

"Let's face it, at least you got a practice run!"

And nothing else could be said after that.

Because he'd gone _there_ , he'd mentioned the baby which wasn't Robert's after all.

The devastation, the pain, the rebuilding.

"Get out." Robert had dared to say, meant it as well.

Aaron can barely look at him now, has his brow knitted as he waits for Robert to reply.

"Not gonna let you stay out here in the cold am I?" Robert says, voice tight, controlled and he keeps the door open. "Or you could go elsewhere. Up to you." He says like he's suddenly trying to feign indifference.

Aaron can't _not_ go in, finds his feet carrying him there before he can even think about it.

And then Robert's making everything feel worse.

"I shouldn't have - I'm sorry for - for making you feel like you don't know what you're doing." Robert says, keeps rocking Annie and she gurgles, pulls a hand towards Aaron and Robert laughs nervously. "See, she wants ya." And Aaron takes a step back.

"I -" Aaron bites down on his lip hard. "I'm so sorry." He blurts out and Robert just looks away.

"You didn't mean it." He says, "You were stressed and -"

"A bloke kissed me and I kissed him back."

Annie stops gurgling almost immediately and Robert staggers back.

He's never looked so hurt in his whole life. Aaron's thinking back to when he found out Seb wasn't his and how heartbroken he is and -

He wants to _cry_.

"What?" Robert blurts out, eyes already filling with tears.

And Aaron can't work out how to say it all.

"I was so angry at myself, because I'd hurt you and - he was there and -" he bought him a drink, asked if he wanted to back to his and then he was kissing him and - "I kissed him back, for - for just a _second_ or two I - don't know." He rubs at his head hard. "And then I said no."

"Why? Not up for sex tonight?" Robert says, voice hollow as he speaks and then he's suddenly moving away from Aaron and placing Annie down on the sofa.

"No, I didn't - I didn't _want_ him. I wanted _you_ and I'd hurt you and -"

"So you thought you'd stick the knife in even deeper." Robert says, and Aaron watches as a tear rolls down his husband's face.

He's made Robert fucking _cry_.

Aaron comes closer to Robert and tries to hold his hand but the older man pushes him away and goes towards Annie's bag.

"I'm so sorry." Aaron panics, heart pounding. "I wasn't - wasn't thinking."

"Yeah you were." Robert snaps. "You're not even drunk, you went to a club and - you wanted to get off with someone whilst I stay here looking after our _daughter_."

Aaron winces, and then he's looking at Robert packing away Annie's favourite elephant. "Where are you -"

"Vic's." He says level headily and then he's putting on Annie's little coat.

"Please don't go. I'm begging ya," Aaron says, tugs at Robert's arm like a lost boy. "I'm _begging_ ya, don't leave me." He's saying and Robert has to look away from him, he gathers Annie up and holds her towards his chest whilst sliding her bag over his shoulder.

"You _kissed_ some random." He says. "We're not meant to hurt each other like that anymore." Robert says, voice breaking and Aaron watches him turn around and have his hand against the door knob.

"It was a _kiss_ , I - didn't _sleep_ with him." And there, the look on Robert's face tells Aaron that he's almost been waiting for that point to surface.

"What? Unlike me?"

And everything is so heavy suddenly.

"That's not what I meant." Aaron says hastily, bites his lip. "I -"

"It's payback." Robert seems to work out. "And I - I deserve it." He speaks hollowly. "Because I was such a bastard back then." He whispers, eyes filled with tears. "And maybe you always had to be the one who hurt me. Because it would hurt the _most_."

Aaron feels something break inside of him and he moves quickly, wants to wrap his arms around his husband but he pushes him back.

"Stay away from me." He cries and Aaron looks at Annie.

"You can't take her from me." He's pleasing. "Please Rob." He says and then he's paling and running towards the sink, throwing up and yeah, maybe he did have too many pints before he kissed some random.

When he looks up again Robert is gone and he cries himself to sleep.

 

 

::

 

 

He sees him in the cafe the next morning, he's reading a newspaper and rocking Annie in his arms at the same time like some sort of pro.

Aaron watches them from the window and then Vic is coming up behind him.

"Don't know what happened but he cried on my shoulder the whole night." She admits. "He's only done that once, when he found out Seb wasn't his."

And Aaron feels his head pounding, his chest is drumming away and he can't breathe.

"I messed up." Aaron admits in a whisper.

"Make it right then." Vic says, pats his back and he only wishes it was that straightforward.

He catches them leaving, Robert's holding her the way he usually does and it makes Aaron's heart melt.

"Robert." He calls and the older man stops dead. He turns and passes Annie over towards Aaron, waits and sees Aaron's face light up the way it usually does.

"I missed you princess." He whispers, and then he's gently stroking her cheek and smiling. When he looks up, he sees how pale and broken Robert looks and how he's trying to hide it. "Can we talk, please?"

And Robert doesn't say anything.

"Just hear me out. It's the least we owe her." He says, looks down at Annie.

"Don't you dare bring her into it. I know what it feels like to come from a broken home and you standing there trying to -" and Aaron knows about his dad, and his mum and the rowing but -

"We're not a bloody broken home." Aaron says passionately, and then Robert's shuffling on his feet.

"Come on then." Robert whispers, and Chas is by the pub looking over when Aaron asks her to have Annie for a few hours.

"Please, I've - I've got to talk to Robert." He says and something in his voice clearly makes her realise it's serious.

So she takes Annie, and Aaron walks two paces behind Robert until he's sitting opposite him in their living room.

"Go on, explain yourself." Robert says slowly and Aaron hesitates.

"I can't." He says. "I - wasn't thinking. He was there and - he wasn't angry at me like you were and I just wanted to stop feeling so -"

He stops, watches Robert wince.

"I don't want to hurt ya."

" _I_ hurt ya." Robert says, looks haunted suddenly. "I broke us into tiny pieces and you hated me."

"We got passed that." Aaron says, and he's quick to hold at Robert's hand. "And we can get passed this _too_." He says.

Robert shudders. "We had a baby because we were ready to put that all behind us." He says, eyes filling with tears. "You knew how scared I was, how petrified I was about arguing and making her feel like it was her fault." He'd been so honest.

Aaron nods, presses their foreheads together. "I'm _sorry_." He tells him. "Please, I'll never hurt our family again. I - I _love_ you, love you _so_ much."

Robert's breathing slows down and then he blinks. "You weren't meant to hurt me." He says heavily. "You're the good one, I'm the fuck up. Not you."

And Aaron shudders. "I'm not perfect."

"You are to me." Robert whispers, and then Aaron's rubbing at Robert's cheek. "Did it feel good, did he - he feel -" and Robert's not the insecure one, it makes Aaron shudder again.

"Look at me." Robert raises his head. "He meant nothing to me. You - you mean everything."

Robert nods slowly, "Don't do it again, _please_." He whispers and Aaron nods.

"I won't." He says and then Robert is slowly moving his arms around Aaron's body and Aaron's pulling him into this crushing hug.

"Love you, love you." Aaron kisses. "Never again, I promise. I just want you and - and I'm so sorry." He cries out, overwhelmed with emotion and Robert pulls them back, holds Aaron's hand tightly.

"Let’s take Annie to the swings." Robert whispers softly and Aaron's too grateful to say anything else.

 

 


End file.
